Shalom, My Friend

This is my reminiscences delivered at my class-mate and close friend's 1 year remembrance function held at Kochi on 27th January, 2024

Today we are here to celebrate the life of an extra-ordinary person – and not to mourn his absence – however greatly we miss him.  What I have to say today may sound a bit longish – but pardon me – this is the bare minimum one can say about a person who has had such a major influence on whoever came to know him.  Also one caveat – while I say this in the 1^st person, the sentiments I mention are shared by many of my class-mates and friends from Britto School and Cochin College.

It was way back in 1976 that Ketan suddenly burst into my life at the annual prize distribution ceremony in Britto school.  I was in the 5^th standard and was feeling thrilled that I was going to get the first ever prize ever for me in “General Proficiency”.  Imagine how humbled I felt that day when a portly and energetic boy going by the name “Ketan.D.Mehta” trotted up the stage several times to collect at least half a dozen prizes – for subjects ranging from academics to extra-curricular activities.  My father who was attending the function prophetically remarked that “this boy Ketan is going very far”.

My relationship with Ketan was initially a bit complicated and competitive.  We were both competing for the attention – and love – of our teachers – so this keen competition did initially lead to a bit of friendly jostling.  Ketan would pull my leg for my “serious” focus on academics; and I will retort with a pun on his name and call him “K.Thendi.Mehta” (Thendi = Vagabond).  To Ketan’s credit he thought that was a very clever pun and he said that he felt good with that pun as it signified to him that his parents had foreseen that he will travel a lot. (Which he did!).  Ketan’s quick sense of humour and his ability to poke fun at himself (his non-existent goal-keeper skills – and later on in life – about his favourite rackish cap to hide his thinning crown) endeared him to a lot of us, and he led by example on how we should approach life – with humour, love and forgiveness.

Ketan really came into his own when we reached high school.  This was when Ketan’s multi-faceted personality became manifest.  He was literally everywhere – from inventing the most creative “Eratta peru” (nick name) for his friends to playing cricket, from participating in Elocution competitions to easily topping in Academics (topped school & University), from fooling around with his friends to being the darling of his teachers, Ketan was a maverick – and a loveable one at that.  His network of friends was very strong, and his friends loved and respected him for his wit and helpful nature.  Indeed, he was a born leader and a very inspiring friend.

Ketan and I got even closer when we joined Cochin College for Pre-Degree.  He joined the Commerce stream and I joined the Science stream - so he in his self-deprecatory style mentioned that he is glad that we are in different streams as we will not have to now compete academically.  I replied that I had long given up trying to compete with him academically.  Because of our mutual interest in Quizzing and Debating we both came under the influence of some inspiring teachers such as Ajit sir, Nithyanand Bhat sir, and Kilikar sir who provided us a lot of guidance and mentoring that stood us in good stead later.  We both used to participate as a team representing Cochin College in various inter-collegiate and Inter-university competitions, and after such competitions we would go over to Ketan’s home where his mother would treat us to delicious dinner.  After dinner, Ketan, his father (Sri. Dilip Mehta) and I would then get into a very stimulating discussion on subjects ranging from current events to Science to Poetry – and I understood the strong influence of both his parents in shaping Ketan’s persona, and how grateful Ketan always was for this immense blessing.

Ketan went through a major health scare in his early 40’s.  On one of his visits to Dubai we met and he opened his heart to me about how that health scare had further broadened his perspective – and of the importance and significance of little Dev in his life.  I was really struck by how deeply he had thought through about life issues – and how cleverly he hid it behind his witty remarks and jokes.  In fact if at all I have a complaint against genius, it is that it is so difficult to penetrate their core thoughts because they always conceal it behind a wall of irreverence and self-deprecatory humour.  But one thing stood out the more I understood Ketan – he was a man now who believed in doing maximum good in this transient passage called Life.  Many are the instances where he has silently helped friends and unknown people – either monetarily or by deed – because of his large heart and generous nature.

Whenever Ketan came to know that any of his class-mates or friends based outside Kochi are in town, he would quickly organize a get-together.  A couple of years ago he surprised me at such a get-together by suddenly producing a small piano and asking me to play an impromptu piece on it.  Last year when I told him I am visiting Kochi around end January he said “Ram – please extend your stay in Kochi by a few days as I am in Maldives.  We have to definitely meet up”.  I agreed immediately to his request – I looked forward to any meetings with Ketan, and his family – Heena, Dev and Ketan’s parents.  Little did I realise then that that meeting will not happen – at least not on planet Earth -and that may be fate had something bigger and better planned.   

Ketan, wherever you are now - I am sure you are beaming down at us right now – wearing your trade-mark cap at a rakish angle – and getting ready to unleash your “Mazal Tov” and your next witty remark on us.  Shalom, Ketan.